Charlie bone The play
by Girlbubble7991
Summary: Come with charlie bone and his friends   and his not so friends  as they go on amazingly random adventures 9 if they can be called adventures  and   mabey   even meet people who  two be honest  realy should'nt be there but aww well sooo... READ IT!
1. Chapter 1

**Charlie bone...THE PLAY!**

**WARNING! I have read all books so this play could contain references to any of the books so if you haven't read them all and do not want spoilers DO NOT READ!**

Director: now introducing Charlie bone the play!

Charlie: Well duh that's the title.

Director: I was just introducing...

Charlie: that's dumb.

Director: Whatever just act!

Lysander: act what?

Director: GAH! *faints*

Tancred: let's just improvise.

Lysander: K.

Emma: Liv this is you department!

Olivia: I'm here!

Gabriel: me too if anyone cares.

Emma: of course we care.

Gabriel: good

Manfred: I'm here!... Does any one care

All: no

Manfred: OI!

Billy: hi guys

All others: Hi

Manfred: hello still here

Olivia: feel free to leave

Manfred: You can't tell me what to do.

Charlie: oh no?...FLAMES!

Manfred: ahhhh! Fine* leaves*

Charlie: he he

Tancred: the flames aren't within ear shot are they?

Charlie: no, no they are not.

Tancred: niiiiice

Emma: Oooooooo look a wishing well come on Tancred * grabs Tancred by the wrist and pulls him over to the well*

Olivia: Where in flips name did that come from?

Emma: Who cares?

Tancred: Ok then * he and Emma take out a 50p and chuck them in the well in unison*

Emma and Tancred: I wish for love forever awwwww * they kiss*

All: Ewwwww!

Lysander: *Chucks in £3*I wish I had cheese.

*cook appears and holds out cheese*

Lysander: HOOOOOOORAY! IT WORKED!*grabs cheese*

*cook vanishes*

Rembrant: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEK* bites cheese and pulls it out of Lysander's hand*

Lysand:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Billy: sorry bout that

Rembrant:*happily* squeak! Squeak!

Lysander: N-no it-it's fine it was j-just my most cherished w-wish th-thats all...

Billy: Well I'm sorry but that _is_ a bit of a weird most cherished wish.

Lysander: N-never mind...OH WHO AM I KIDDING!*falls over and starts twitching and crying*

Tancred: *pulls Lysander up and slaps him* Pull your self together man

Lysander: *sniffs * y-you're right *sniff* I'll be fine *grins*.

Olivia: I think we should wake up the director.

Lysander: ok *a cloud appears over director and downpours on him*

Director: *wakes up* ow my head. Why am I wet? Oh guys so how far are you guys in the scripted? *stands up*

All: What script!

Director: oh god, here we go again *faints again*

All: Bye then everyone

Charlie: do you think we should help him

Lysander: nah he'll be fine * curtains close*

Olivia's voice: we have curtains? Who new?

Me: *steps on to stage* That was an introduction to Charlie bone the play *goes through curtain*

My voice: do you think we might need a new director?

The end (so far)

**Ok so what did you think ? Please review and so on so that I know if its worth my time to right more (if I do they will probably be longer than this one)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Charlie Bone The play**

**The strange behaviour of the animals**

**I was thinking about what might be funny and it dawned upon me how very many animals there are in the Charlie bone series so this is what I came up with read and enjoy**

Me: come on pleeeeeeeeease!*blink, blink halo, halo*

Director: I will not after last time, I passed out twice and got socked! You'll just have to find a new Director!

Me: I tried but no one would please, please, please!

Director: Fine but If they mess this up...

Me: they won't!

Director: fine, I'm off to find my beret *leaves*

Me: OK guys... DON'T SCREW THIS UP!

All: fine

Director: what's going on?* looks suspicious*

Me: nothing, all is well. He he.

Director: O...K... Now begin!

Manfred: Charlie bone I my arch foe

Charlie: Manfred Bloor my ... well I don't think you are quite dangerous enough to count as an arch foe.

Director: *to me* those are not the lines.

Me: well er I think they work

Director: If they don't...

Me: please don't finish that sentence

Director: fine

Manfred: You'll pay for t...ahhhh!

*Mr. Onimous, Billy, Mrs. Kettle, Miranda and Benjamin crash into Manfred and all start talking at once*

Charlie: SHUT UP! Now Mr. Onimous please start.

Mr Onimous: The flames are acting oddly

Mrs Kettle: And so is solemn

Billy: and rembrant.

Benjamin: and runner

Miranda: and Chattypatra

Charlie: TAKE ME TO THEM AND I SHALL SAVE THE DAY!Hi Miranda haven't see you in ages.

Emma: Charlie!

Charlie: sorry

*all rush off t*

Manfred:*wakes up* what happened...HEY THEY DICHED ME!

Director: Do you call this not. MESSING. UP?

Me: well er lets follow them and see what happens.

Director: fine*we both leave in the same direction as the others*

*In a random field every one who ran off arrive in front of a random Stage*

Charlie: OK. Other than the stage in the middle of a field I see nothing odd

Bill: wait for it.

*suddenly the flames all jump up from behind the stage wearing backwards caps jackets and allot of bling*

Charlie: That is odd

Others: you haven't seen any thing yet

*music starts playing*

Flames: *rapping* yo yo yo we're the flames you know.

Aries: I'm Aries

Leo: I'm Leo

Sagittarius: I'm sageie

Flames: Go, go. we're super cats we don't just sit a round and chat.

*Flames still rap badly in background*

Charlie: ok so the flames are rapping what's up with the other animals?

Billy: you'll see

*Solomon appears wearing a backwards cap and a gold chain with a big gold 's' on it*

Flames: Now meet our mate Solo a feathery snake. He's blue, he's cool now take it s man

Solo: I'm sssssuper

flames: say what, say what?

Solo:sssssuper!

Flames: say what, say what?

*they continue in this maner*

Emma: er Charlie ?

Charlie: yup?

emma: Haven you seen Claerwen recently?

Charlie: No why?

*emma points to stage where claerwen has just flown up above the cats and the snake wearing a tiny backwards cap, gold chain with a c on it and a ring on each of her legs*

Charlie: Oh no.

clarwen: I used to be a wand but now I'm a moth and I am here to rock you socks.

*rembrant runs out on to stage wearing.. well I think you can guess the sort of thing*

rembrant: YO! Clear the stage for the greatest calboration in all of time! CHECK IT OUT!

* runner bean and chattypatra apper wear ing match outfits(chatty's purple runner's dark bule)you can guess what they look like*

runner: *rapping*we're the coolest dogs in town.

chatty: go on ,look around!

Charlie:SHUT UUUUP!

Leo:*in hurt voice* Yo dawg

Runner and chatty:what?

leo: Not you dogs him dawg

runner and chatty; ok

* suddenly there is a bright flash and the ghost of cout harken appers*

All:AHHHHHHH!

Harken: AHHHHHHHH!*hides behind tree*

Me: What will happen next? will we save the animals,will the director stay if not ,will we find a new one and will we find out what in flips name the ghost of count harken is doing here? Find out in the next chapter!

**Do you see that button down there it's sad and the only way to make it happy is to click on it, please think of the buttons, do your part for them and click.**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 the strange behaviour of the animals part 2

**A/N sorry I this took me so long I've had writers block. IT IS AN EVIL THING! I just remembered this I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THESE CHARATERS!**

**Charlie Bone the play! **

Me: Last time on Charlie bone the play. We started off well but then Billy, Miranda, Mrs. Kettle, Mr. Onimous and Benjamin turned up to tell Charlie that their animals were acting oddly, they all went to a random stage in the middle of a random field and the animals (even clarwen) started raping on it (the stage) and then the ghost of count harken appeared every one screamed (including count harken) and count Harken hid behind a tree. Ok on with the show!

Charlie: That's odd...

Fidelio: OI HOW COME I HAVEN'T BEEN HERE YET!

Me: shut it Fido

Fido: Oi only my friends can call me that!

Me: Do I look like I care?

Fido: even Miranda is in this and like she's only in like ONE book and I'm, like, Charlie's first friend at Bloors!

Me: Listen Fido now your here and you can help the others work this whole thing out while I try to wake the Director up. *leaves*

Charlie: Ok Fido your smart what should we do?

Fido: HOW THE FLIP SHOULD I KNOW!

Billy: don't yell.

Fido: fine... HARKEN!

Billy: That was yelling.

Harken: pay no attention to the ghost behind the tree.

Emma: do you really think that's going to work? *raises one eyebrow*

Harken: Nooooooo...well yes but...

Charlie: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO THE ANIMALS YOU FOULE FIEND?

Harken: hey there's no need for name calling.

Charlie; ANSWER YOU VILINOUS VERMIN!

Harken: I did nothing. And don't call me names.

Emma: nothing...REALY?

Harken: well maybe something...

All: WHAT?

Harken: well when I died I turned into a ghost and ghosts aren't very good at magic, but I still tried. Now one annoying thing about being a ghost sorcerer is that we can only do magic on animals. So I tried to make all animals obey me...

Charlie: But something went wrong and this happened *he gestures at the animals in their rapping outfits*

Harken: pretty much... yup.

Me: HARKY!

Harken; I thought the name calling had stopped!

Me:shut it! SO IT'S YOUR FAULT THAT THIS HAS BEEN ALL MESSED UP AND I WILL PROBABLY HAVE NO DIRECTOR BEFORE THIS IS OVER!

Harken: errr... Yup

Me: GRRRRRRRRRR!

Harken: hide me!*attempts to hide behind a small, pink, fluffy cushion*

Me: *rolls eyes and leaves*

Charlie: right now then FIX THIS!

Harken; how?

All: YOU DON'T KNOW!

Harken: well duh otherwise I would have made them stop it's, really annoying

Animals: *in offended tones* Yo dawge

Charlie: WELL WE CAN'T HELP, YOU'RE THE SOCCORER!

Harken: YOU HAVE A WAND!

Charlie: YES AND SHE IS A MOTH THAT IS CURENTLY IN A RAPPING TRANCE!

Harken: ahhhh I see

Charlie: yup

Harken: WE MUST WORK TOGETHER!

All: no.

Harken: aw come on!

Emma: shut it brain dead

Tancred: You're so funny

Emma: you're so sweet

Tancred: no you are

Emma: No you are

Tancred: no you

Emma: No you

Billy; EW!

Tancred and Emma: HEY!

Fido: we still have a problem!

*Uncle Paton and runs in*

All: Hi

Paton: I HAVE GOOD NEWS!

All: what is it?

Paton: how are you doing that?

All: what?

Paton: talking at the same time?

All: *look at each other * don't know

Paton: weird

Charlie: anyway your news uncle Paton

Paton: well I heard about the animals rapping...

Lysander: how?

Me: ME!

Charlie: good, anyway your news uncle Paton

Paton: well I started looking through my books and discovered what to do when the ghost of a sorcerer does a spell wrong

Charlie: wow that must have taken ages

Paton: actually it hardly took any time at all it was on the first page of the first book I picked up.

Charlie: oh...

Paton: anyway it said...

Charlie: WAIT! Whisper it to me.

Paton: oooookaaayyy *whispers to Charlie*

Charlie: He says that the ghost that cast the spell must say that he is the biggest flipping idiot on the planet for trying the spell

Harken: I'm the biggest flipping idiot on the planet for trying the spell... Nothing happened

All: *burst out laughing*

Charlie:*laughing* not really I was kidding sheesh any way you need to say Blingo Blango blibby blobby

Harken: ... Blingo Blango blibby blobby

Animals:*stop rapping an the rappy cloths vanish*

Rembrandt: squeak*jumps into bills pocket*

All other animals: *go to there owners*

All: *vanish and repaper on stage*

Lysander: how did that happen?

Olivia: no idea

Charlie: so all is well

Director: *storms across stage* THATS IT I'M OUT! THE END! I'M GONE!*leaves slamming door*

Me: Well! WELL! IT'S NOT WELL! NOT IN THE LEAST WELL! WE HAVE NO DIRECTOR FOR FLIPS SAKE AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!*fumes*

Charlie: er Yeh sorry about that *escapes and is followed quickly by others*

*curtains close quickly and then collapse on top of me*

Me: ARG!

Fido: er ya I was bored before so I was fiddling with the controls... hehe*escapes*

Me: ARG! YOU ARE ALL DEAD!*Runs off stage after every one*

**A/N: Right so that's that again sorry it took so long. click and make a button happy today :) i.e. REVEIW! **


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4 a new director

**A/N: sorry about the delay I've been very busy with school and holiday and Christmas and stuff anyway I OWN NO CHARECTERS! And I'm dedicating this to my friend in the loft cause she helped me with it now ON WITH THE SHOW!**

**Charlie Bone the play**

Me:*standing in the middle of the stage in front of curtains* sorry but this performance has been cancelled due to the fact that we have no director

Audience: awwwww no fair

Me: yes I'm sure that you are all devastated...

Audience member 1: so it's over?

Me: Pretty much you must be so sa...

Audience member2: so there's no ice cream!

All other audience members: *gasp* no... Ice cream?

Me: YES NO FLIPPIN ICECREAM!

Audience:*fall to their knees* NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

Me: so u don't care about the play

Audience member 3: hell no

Me: GRRRRRRRRR!

Audience member 3: DONT HURT ME!

Me: why is it that every time I say grrr they assume that I'm gonna hurt someone

Audience member 1: cause your scary

Me: OH! ...*sighs* whatever we don't have a director so what's the point

Charlie: *come out from behind curtains* can't one of us do it?

Me: nope.

Olivia: *come out also*well maybe someone from your other story could help.

Me: Yeh I tried that.

Olivia: and?

Me: they ran for the hills

Olivia: ah...

Emma: *bounces out from behind curtains with Tancred* maybe someone else's characters might want to help

Me: Yeh maybe my friend In the loft could help

In the loft: Heya! I am making a guest appearance and am so very excited!

Me: Hi so I need someone to be a director. Do you know anyone who could help?

In the loft:*zaps Oliver! Characters onto the stage* What happened to the old director dude?

Me: He errr... had to leave rather...errr... suddenly and...er... unexpectedly *weird grin*

In the loft: Very unfortunate. The best directors always do vanish suddenly and unexpectedly. Anyways. I think these guys could be AWESOME directors!

Me: right then, good, so *turns to Oliver! Characters* who wants to a director?

Bill Sikes: I think I would make an EXCELLENT director.

Charlie: NOOOOOOOOOO I'VE READ ABOUT HIM NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOO ANYONE ELS! !

Sikes: *cracks knuckles* and 'oo might you be you young pipsqueak?

Charlie: I AM CHARLIE BONE DECENDENT OF THE RED KING ON MY DADS SIDE AND A WIZARD ON MY MUMS SIDE, PICTURE TRAVELER, DEFEATER OF THE EVIL COUNT HARKEN, and AND ALL ROUND AUSOME GUY WITH A WAND THAT'S A MOTH!

Claerwen: *flies out and lands on Charlies shoulder*

Bill: Oh. Well... Hum... Er...

Olivia: oh come on Charlie, give the scary dude a chance... *whispering* do you really think we can't handle him?

Charlie: good point

Fagin: Hey! I think I'd be a much better director than him!

Me: oh how to choose... oh how about a comp

Olivia: like a drama one?

Me: no Liv a directing one

All: good plan then we see who's best at it and pick that person

Me: well the two possible directors will come up with a short scene with the characters, after we *indicates myself and Charlie bone characters* will explain the relationships between them like friends, enemies etc, and then the audience and I will choose which was best *smile happily*

Audience member 2: so will there be ice cream?

Me: *sigh* yup

Audience: HUZZAR, HUZZAR!

Fagin: Sounds like a plan of EPIC proportions m'dear.

Sikes: Don't be sure you'll win old man

me: ok wait sec *goes off with Charlie bone characters and Sikes and Fagin to explain characters relation ships but NOT their powers cause that might be useful later who knows* u guys just do stuff back in a mo

Oliver: I'll sing and entertain everyone! *begins Where is Love* 12:06 PM

Dodger: *looks bored*

Nancy: *elbows Dodger*

Audience member 1: aw

Audience member 2: I'M BORED

Audience member 3: I want ice cream

Oliver: Don't you like my song?

AM (audience member) 1: I LIKE IT!

Oliver: YAY! *to Dodger* Ha!

Dodger: *yawns*

Nancy: Boys! Don't fight.

AM 2: BOO, HISS, GET OFF!

AM 3: WHERE IS THE ICECREAM!

Dodger: Wasn' goin' to Nance. I'd beat 'im in a second anyways.

In the Loft: *throws ice cream at AM 3*

AM 3: THANK YOU IN THE LOFT!*scoffs ice cream*

Me: *bows* Very welcome.

Me: *returns with Charlie bone characters and Sikes and Fagin* we're back did any thing get destroyed while we were gone?

Me: Nope. Not anything. I found ice cream!

AW 3: YES SHES THE BEST PERSON EVER!* continues to scoff ice cream*

Me: ok... good

In the Loft: I like that guy!

AW 1: I like the small child who can sing!

AW 2: he's boring

AW 1: HE IS NOT HE HAS THE VOICE OF AN ANGEL!

AW 2: right you just keep believing that

Oliver: Thanks AW 1!

Fido: *randomly pops in* AGAIN WHY DO YOU ALWAYS FORGET ABOUT ME!

Me: sorry Fido

Charlie: *whispering to Olivia* wow she can be… nice!

Me: That was a stage whisper Charlie

Charlie: Hehe… oops

Fagin: I am ready for this competition. It sounds like a great challenge. I SHALL WIN!

Sikes: Don't be sure, oldie

Fagin: At least my hat doesn't look like someone sat on it!

Sikes: OI!

Me: OK! Then who wishes to go first?

Me: OK! Then who wishes to go first?

Sikes: I shall, and let the rat man know who's boss!

Me: now, now every one is equal in this competition right then come up with a scene and, well DIRECT! Have a beret *throws beret to Sikes*

Sikes: *swaps hats* Hm. I feel like a fool in this hat.

Fagin: You look like one too

Charlie bone characters:*fall about laughing*

Sikes: *glares, and hands out scripts to the Charlie Bone characters*

Charlie: interesting...

Emma: I guess...

Sikes: OK. Three, two, one... ACTION!

Charlie: I AM CHARLIE BONE!

Emma: I AM EMMA TOLLY!

Sikes: Say it with more passion.

Olivia: WAIT A SEC HOLD IT, HEY DIRECTOR THIS SAYS THAT I AM WEARING JEANS AND A TSHIRT!

Sikes: *sighs* Yes. What about it?

Emma: Olivia doesn't wear jeans and a t-shirt... unless it's a disguise

Sikes: Well she does now. OK, let's skip to the bit where you start saying how great I am.

Olivia: *flicks through to that bit* 'wow bill Sikes is so great and clever'*raises eyebrow* do you really expect us to say this junk?

Emma: cause I'm not gonna

Charlie: nor me

Fido: no way

Sikes: Yes you are. *looks threatening and beats cudgel into left hand*

Tank and Lysander: oh we are sooooooo scared (!)

Charlie: Yeh we're quaking in our shoes (!)

Emma and Olivia: so afraid (!)

Sikes: *gets mad* AAAAAAAAA! DO AS I SAY MINIONS! I COMMAND THEE!

Me: Oh man

Charlie bone characters: DID YOU JUST CALL US MINIONS!* angry wind starts blowing around Tanc, drums are heard and ghostly shapes start to paper around Lysander, dinosaurs and tigers and other scary animals appear around Olivia* YOU SHOULD REALY THINK ABOUT THAT!

Sikes: *high pitched scream and he runs away*

Charlie bone characters: now he knows not to mess with us

Me: Oh guys! Ok I guess that means bill Sikes is out of the comp so that means...Fagin we have to see if the audience like your stuff so... go

Fagin: *hands everyone their scripts*

Charlie: *turns it upside down* is this hand written?

Lysander: and not neatly

Fagin: OK, I can't write very well

Dodger: You didn' write that!

Fagin: Sssssssssssssssssssssh!

Dodger: *fumes*

Fagin: Just... Act?

Emma: what does he mean you didn't write it?

Olivia: I DONT LIKE PEOPLE WHO LIE IN THE THEARTER!

Fagin: I never said I wrote it. I just said I couldn't write very well. Anyway. I dictated...

oliva: ok so u came up with the lines and so on?

Fagin: Exactly

Olivia: ok then...

Fagin: Good

emma: so should we start?

Fagin: Excellent plan miss. Start

charlie: I am about to go shopping to buy a cake

Emma: I will come with you

olivia: wait friends the shop has been vandilised

emma and charlie: OH NO!

Fido: WHAT WILL BECOME OF US!

tanc: excuse me mister director?

Fagin: Yes?

Tanc: is this whole 5 page script about a cake shop?

Fagin: No. You get to the drama in a second!

all:*turn page* ok that is drama...

Lysander: *runs on to stage glances at script* THE OWNER OF THE SHOP IS DEAD! 3:21 PM all others on stage:*gasp*

AM1: this is stupid

AM3: yeh no proper plot line

AM2: BOO!

audience:*start booing ang hissing and etc*

me: I don't think they like it fagin...

Fagin: How very depressing. MY DREAMS OF AN ACTING CAREER - RUINED!

Dodger: You have dreams?

Nancy: Of an acting career?

charlie: *looks at the hand written pages* question, erm old guy whos name escapes me, have you ever heard of a computer?

Fagin: A com-put-er?

charlie:*pulls random computer (appel mac) on a table with wheels in* this thing is a computer

me: where did you find that?

Fagin: AAAAAAAA IT WILL KILL US ALL!

charlie: I found it backstage some where... and its not gonna kill you

Fagin: *comes out from where he was hiding behind Oliver* Oh... er... I knew that...

AM 1: so you though it was gonna kill some one so you hide behinde I small child... that is wimpy and mean

Oliver: Tell me about it!

Me: *stands at the front of the stage* EVERY ONE LISTEN!... i think that this play can survive without a director I mean it didn't go well with one so Oliver! Charecters I am afraid that you are no longer needed, please leave and In the loft, thanks for the help , You wanna help me say goodbye to the audience?

Me: Sounds awesome!

me: well thats the end of the show this time everybody see you next time I'm Girlbubble7991 and this is...

In The Loft: In the Loft Cheerio!

*crutain falls on us*

me: FIDO!

**A/N: well I hope you liked it and thanks to In The loft again for the help in the real world! CICK ON THE BUTTON TO MAKE IT HAPPY!...R&R!**


End file.
